Just another few days to wait. Waiting is hard! Many of us remember waiting for bar results DURING Thanksgiving --trying to make it through that holiday meal wondering, not knowing, hoping, yet not daring to hope too hard lest you jinx it.
Ask anyone who spent a Thanksgiving waiting for bar exam results and he or she remembers. Not fun!
Whether you are eagerly awaiting or dreading the news, results will be out this Friday. So, Friday, you will have news. Hopefully it will be the news you want to hear!!!
Finding out you passed the Bar Exam is one of the most exciting pieces of news that can be delivered. It's an awesome feeling! It's joy, it's relief, it's excitement, it's doors opening...
One law school I worked with regularly holds a Gala Reception, just after Bar Exam results come out, to celebrate their successful graduates. There is a gorgeous wine and cheese spread, piles of luscious fruit and desserts. Each successful graduate is invited to stand before the assembly and tell his or her story....
Where were you when you learned you passed. Who did you want with you when you found out? Did you check the site or did you ask your boyfriend or Mom to check for you.
Some people describe seeing their names and immediately texting classmates and friends to share their joy. For other students, there were tears of joy. One student laughed, "I yelled so loud my neighbors came rushing up to see if everything was OK."
Parents and grandparents who had only dreamt of going to college watched this new generation of potential, glowing with pride. This "new generation of potential,” that is you. When you pass the bar exam, you are potential, you are the future! It's awesome, it's thrilling. It’s something to celebrate, big time!
Remember, though, there will be classmates who do not make it this time. That's tough. It's rough to be the one who didn't make it when friends did. It’s also painful to console people who you know should have made it.
Some face that challenge of having to re-take the exam easier than others, especially people who may have been working full time or otherwise just knew they had not given it their all. But it's never easy. It almost always means a game plan must be devised, a way to prevail must be developed, and then a strategy for success must be realized.
In so many ways, receiving the news of bar exam is similar to getting all of life's news. One day it's a call from someone offering you or a loved one a promotion, the position you always dreamed of; that news is a vote of confidence, a moment in the sun, an opportunity for change. Maybe it's a call to say a new healthy baby was born. That’s pure joy. But, another day, the news is pure pain, it's a call from a close friend, your age, who has just been diagnosed with cancer and is facing surgery, chemo, radiation, and the challenges of trying to rebuild a semblance of normalcy when the very core has been shaken.
Is it hyperbole, or even offensive, to equate bar passage or failure with life threatening illness? It isn't meant offensively, so if it's taken that way, apologies in advance. What it's meant to acknowledge is how important this news really is –and how deeply it affects those of us who receive it.
Unless you have taken the bar exam, it's hard to convey just how big it feels. You work and dream of going to law school for a long time, then you work for three, or four, of the hardest years ever, then you study for months, then you take a days’ long grueling exam. Then, after all that, you wait months for results. As Ringo Starr sang about something altogether different, "It don't come easy; you know it don't come easy...."
Many who didn't take it think, it's 'Just a test. How hard can it be and why do people get so wigged out?’ It is not, “just a test.” It is far bigger than any “test" you have ever taken, and likely anyone you ever will. It's hard to hide from people in your world that you are awaiting results. Everyone knows. It should not be, but for many people it becomes a referendum on who you are.
Try to keep it in context, and in perspective. Failing is not the end of the world, but it’s not fun either. If you or someone you know ends up in that position, be strong, and be kind. Then, get very practical and develop a super smart strategy for success in February.
And, if you are waiting for results right now, it will be a long few days. Hang in there. Go see a funny movie. Take an afternoon off for a beautiful hike or walk. Have a bubble bath and champagne. Buy a new toy, a gadget, some new apps… Distract yourself with positives. Surround yourself with good and positive people who will love and support you no matter what news Friday brings. Remind yourself how wonderful you are, however the results come out.
If you are a friend or family member of someone awaiting results, be patient and be nice this week. Dredge up every ounce of respect and compassion you can muster. See what that person wants from you. Give space. Provide comfort and laughter when that is called for, but back off too. Help with being a positive distraction, but refrain from the negative wherever possible. Realize that even if your loved one is not expressing it, he or she will be all-consumed with getting on that website Friday, and finally finding out, one way or another, what the future will hold....
If the news comes in happily, I expect to hear “Congratulations” shouting out from all the rooftops. If the news comes in otherwise, let's work together to focus on success for February. All you need is a plan. Ringo was right about rock 'n roll, and it's true of the law as well --It don't come easy. But with commitment, belief in yourself, hard work, and a smart strategy for success, you CAN do it!
Bottom line, if July was your exam, CONGRATULATIONS; if not, February will be your time to shine!!!!
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